A young Texan grew up wanting to be a lawman. He grew up big, 6′ 2″, strong as a longhorn, and fast as a mustang. He could shoot a bottle cap tossed in the air at 40 paces.
When he finally came of age, he applied to where he had only dreamed of working: the West Texas Sheriff’s Department.
After a series of tests and interviews, the Chief Deputy finally called him into his office for the young man’s last interview.
The Chief Deputy said, “You’re a big strong kid and you can really shoot. So far your qualifications all look good, but we have, what you might call, an “Attitude Suitability Test”, that you must take before you can be accepted.
We don’t let just anyone carry our badge, son.”
Then, sliding a service pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, the Chief said, “Take this pistol and go out and shoot:
six illegal aliens,
six meth dealers,
six Muslim extremists,
and a rabbit.”
“Why the rabbit?” queried the applicant.
“You pass,” said the Chief Deputy.”When can you start?”
They sent my Census form back! AGAIN!!!
In response to the question: “Do you have any dependents?”
I replied – “12 million illegal immigrants; 3 million crack heads; 42 million unemployable people, 2 million people in over 243 prisons; Half of Mexico; and 535 more in the U.S. House and Senate.”
Apparently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.
Thanks to iOwnTheWorld.com » Blog Archive
‘Looking for Work’
Some doctors are chatting at a conference, and the Israeli says: "In Israel, the medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man’s testicles and transplanted them into another man, and it only took 6 weeks before he was looking for work!"
So the German one goes: "Sehr gut, but in Germany we are able to take part of the brain out of a person, we put it into another person’s head, and in just 4 weeks he is looking for work."
A Russian doctor retorts: "Big deal- in Russia, we take a heart from a person, we put it into another’s chest, and in a mere 2 weeks he is right back, seeking employment!"
The American doctor then says: "Ah, but that’s nothing my colleagues, you are way, way behind us. In the States a couple years back, we took a guy from Kenya with no brains, no heart, and no balls … made him President – and now the whole country is looking for work!"
Thanks to Reaganite Republican: ‘Looking for Work’